Have the Difficult Conversation
Why don’t we ever have the difficult conversation?
We push it off into the future or push things left unsaid deep inside of ourselves. When we do that it only causes problems. It prolongs discord within relationships and causes stress, anxiety, pain, illness, and disease within us if left there to fester.
There are so many things left unsaid or unasked.
- Are you proud of me, Dad?
- I want to have more intimate time with you.
- I love you.
- I wish you would focus on me instead of doing other things when you call me.
- Can I do anything to be a better mom?
One person we were working with helped her sister after an accident. She brought her over a few helpful things. Her sister said, “I don’t need any of this. No one knows what I need!” The sister was so taken aback by the affront that she didn’t ask the question, “What DO you need?”
The one thing that we must do to have great relationships is to have the difficult conversation.
The one that makes us feel exposed and vulnerable, and shows our cards to the other person. We avoid them because we don’t want to give away power or look foolish, or we’re either consciously or subconsciously afraid of what the answer will be.
While we avoid these difficult conversations at all costs, they are the most healing, and necessary.
When we push these things down, we get a general sense of anxiety that can turn into illness or even disease.
So have the difficult conversation. It will clear up any misunderstandings, provide clarity, and can potentially lead you to get what you want. You can free yourself! And then the other person has the freedom to respond. They may say something amazing that positively shifts everything in your relationships. They may not be willing to discuss. Or they may say something that you don’t like. But either way, you have shown up as the person that you want to be. With no regrets.