Podcast Episode 016 – Is Everyone an Empath?
IS EVERYONE AN EMPATH?
In this episode, Kevin and Kelli explore the question and guide you through a process showing what you can do instead of taking on/absorbing the energy from others and the world so that you can experience the purity of your own consciousness. They discuss:
- The differences between healthy empathetic expressions and conditioned hyper-vigilance
- Shifting from taking on (and sometimes feeling responsible for) the energy of others to
- Strengthening and growing your own energy field through a process Kevin guides us through, taking you “off the radar” of energy vampires/narcissists/abusers
- The best thing you can do for someone who’s going through a rough time
Radical Relationships Transformation Series Spring 2022 – Info and Registration:
Here’s what you can do when you feel like you’re responsible for someone else’s wellbeing:
Here is the link to the global consciousness project Kevin talks about in this episode showing that energy increases in areas BEFORE traumatic events occur:
Kevin Russell 0:16
Welcome to radical enlightenment,
Kelli Russell 0:18
your springboard into releasing resistance expanding awareness and elevating consciousness with Coven
Kevin Russell 0:24
and Kelli Russell. Before we get to today’s episode, we wanted to let you know about our upcoming Radical Relationships transformation series, which kicks off on May 6 2022. This course is a combination of self directed whole system approaches to experience more mental and emotional well being and true inner freedom in all of our relationships. In this course, you’ll learn how to disrupt old patterns, stop volatile arguments and improve communication. Let go of resentment, experience healthier relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners, and stay balanced within yourself, no matter who does what, and no matter what is going on outside of you. More information, and registration is at radical enlightenment.com. And now on to today’s episode.
Kelli Russell 1:20
So earlier today, we were having conversation after breakfast. And I asked Kevin, do you believe that everybody is an empath? And we thought we would take this conversation to the podcast. So Kevin, you know, you start what was your answer?
Kevin Russell 1:37
Yes. Short answer. I think every one of us it’s a pre baked aspect of our system, that that capacity is within every one of our experiences. I think the difference is the degree to which it’s explored or expressed, and the quality in which it’s expressed. And I think a lot of that is based on everything we accumulate over a lifetime, our beliefs, our conditioning, the ways of being in a family, and the society in the world. I think a lot of those factors are pretty impactful on how this naturally occurring expression of empathy expresses within each of us. About you?
Kelli Russell 2:26
Well, I think everybody is an empath. And I believe that this is how we can communicate non verbally. So just as we see schools of fish moving as a group, effortlessly with formation, and same with birds in the sky. I think that we emit electromagnetic signals with our thoughts and feelings. And we also have shown that even just our heart can send out a message that goes beyond 15 feet out in front of us. So we are literally in a sea of energy. And we are emitting energy wherever we go. And this is how we communicate non verbally as a species. But we are never taught this. In fact, at least in our generation, in our parents’ generation. We were taught often to disregard or to shut down or were made fun of for bringing it up or taught to ignore the signals that we get. So those that have stumbled upon it, they go, Oh, my gosh, I’m an empath. I feel everything. And, you know, it’s it seems like novel or special. But I think that we all, like you said have that capacity. But a lot of us just turn that off. don’t notice. Call it something else.
Kevin Russell 3:52
Yeah, and it’s actually been quantified. Interestingly enough. There’s a research study that we can link to in the notes that set up recording or like kind of energetic listening stations around the world. And I think it was just preceding or during or just after big events. These stations would record massive spikes in I think it was energetic output. And it was right before right around 911. It was right around natural disaster earthquake in Mexico. I think there’s another event, I think there’s a natural disaster event in Asia, where it recorded this electrostatic charge of energy output. And they quantified it to this is a collective output of human energy right around these events. So there’s some aspect of almost this energetic knowing or this energetic response to our environment, before we have a conscious or experiential awareness of it. I think that can be beneficial and challenging. In one of the ways I’ve seen this Express, and this is, to me this is either a misinterpretation or maybe an assumption of Well, that’s the way being an empath is. And that’s the idea of hyper vigilance. And so if we’ve experienced trauma when we’re young, or polarizing contrast in a household say it’s with a narcissistic parent, or a high needs parent, where a mother or father’s sense of well being sense of purpose, sense of self, is kind of projected on a child that can create a state of hyper vigilance within that child. So you’re hyper attuned to your environment, sense with your senses. And that is almost even preceded by your by the energy.
Kelli Russell 6:03
So that could be like an abusive situation, or an alcoholic or drug abusing parent or something where this person had to be walking on eggshells all the time, hyper aware of the environment, because if you say the wrong thing in the wrong moment, that could lead to an attack of some sort. So you’re constantly managing the emotions of others so that you can stay safe in that environment. Is that what you’re talking about?
Kevin Russell 6:26
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Even to the extent of your system will react to how the keys are sounding in the lock, when the parents coming home, how the fridge door closes, if they go in for you know, if they go and grab a beer right away, or something like that your system is processing and categorizing, and really defining where and what and how you should be in the situation for safety, the tone of their voice? Yeah, yeah, how the keys dropping in the key tray or whatever we’ve gotten in the home. Yeah. And then we grow up. And our word for what we’re experiencing is, oh, I’m an empath. But I’ve seen very often the expression of that is really just carrying so much weight of our perception of others, energy. And I hear this from friends and clients where it’s like, oh, I can’t go to places with a lot of people, because I just get inundated, I get under an avalanche of emotions. And I’m just, I’m just really feeling everybody’s emotion. And I think there is something to that, as far as a method or mechanism of understanding others. But the challenge is when we, through our filter, interpret other people’s energy or emotions, we’re actually not necessarily impacting them at all. We are just, you know, making like a fax copy, or a duplicate of what we are interpreting they’re experiencing. And then that’s internalized, because it’s being filtered through that very powerful subconscious safety program that’s been running on hyper vigilance for our entire lives.
Kelli Russell 8:14
So say more about that, where we are interpreting what we believe they might experiencing through our own lens. So are you saying that that has a chance to get worked or, or we’re downloading it into our own system, and we start to experience some similar things, or,
Kevin Russell 8:31
yeah, I think both anytime that we are connecting with another, but it’s going through our filters of dis-ease, are programmed and conditioned ways of being at the subconscious. at the cellular level. It’s, it’s a, it’s adding to the energetic equation. And our systems are filtering this energy through these protection and safety mechanisms. And because our systems are hyper attuned for risk avoidance, there’s a high probability that it’s going to create an internal state of fear or anxiety or sadness or whatever kind of the negative spectrum expression is because our system is saying what somebody else is experiencing, you are taking on you are experiencing as well, because you have been hyper attuned to these types of exchanges your entire life. So the system is hyper attuned, to find them out and to filter them through its own set of locks and filters, and have it expressed as safety. And one of the easiest ways to keep us safe is to keep us in fear. If we’re fearful or if we’re on the defensive, or if we’re reactionary, there’s a higher probability that we’re not going to be going out and, you know, living a heart centered or inspired or internally driven life, we’re going to be very much conditioned to our environment. And the system is going to try and keep us the system where within our body mind body systems are going to try and keep us safe at all costs.
Kelli Russell 10:15
So why wouldn’t our system want us to have an open hearted unconditionally loving experience out in the world.
Kevin Russell 10:23
So it’s not necessarily that our system doesn’t want those things, it’s just that it doesn’t have a blueprint for it, it doesn’t really have an operational basis for those expressions of tapping in and tuning into who we are at our core. Because we’ve been so focused on the external for our survival
Kelli Russell 10:42
on others, and how they feel rather than how do I feel and a self driven life. So when they’re out in the environment, in restaurants at a grocery store, out on the street, they are sensing other people’s emotional states, so that they can ensure their safety.
Kevin Russell 11:03
I think that’s a really beautiful way to put it. And because the language that we use is, oh, I’m an empath. We conduct the word with the feeling. And it’s like, oh, well, it must this expression must be the expression of an empath, or empathy, when it’s actually a condition program of hyper vigilance based on survival.
Kelli Russell 11:27
And I think definitely both are true. I mean, absolutely.
Kevin Russell 11:30
I think hyper vigilance is funny, funnily enough, is kind of getting thrown into the deep end of life and like, hey, learn how to swim. So you really do cultivate these, the core foundation of an empath, or empathetic experience using those tools that come naturally that we’ve all got, but the expression is adulterated or it’s it’s tweaked because of the external experience. So me personally, my experience with Empath, the empath tool or being empathetic is one of in practice is one of being able to connect with a client and understand and almost in my mind’s eye, see where they’re at. But not over giving, or hemorrhaging or diminishing my energy. As part of that exchange, it’s holding my space where I’ve come to live from that heart centered, broadcast love space, as opposed to almost like, you know, to soldiers in a foxhole, where we’re commiserating based on our similar conditioned traumas that we’ve experienced.
Kelli Russell 12:42
And lately a term that you’ve been using as interface. So rather than taking on the energy of others as your own, you are maintaining your own consciousness, energetic feelings, but you’re interfacing with theirs, so you can get a sense of what they might be experiencing?
Kevin Russell 13:03
Yeah. It’s, it’s, well, you know, it’s all different levels in different stages, but it’s all very similar expressions. So even in what you just shared, I’m still exploring this concept, and how the tool of you know how to kind of the turning on of the tool of Empath, or empathy works for me. And I think that’s, I think the biggest thing for anybody to take away is just never stop, never stop with oh, that’s the way it is. Or I’m an empath, and this is the way I’m out. I am forever. Because it’s its energy. It’s an energetic expression. It’s an energetic function of our systems. And we can transform it. And the Change never really stops. It’s a yeah, when I went from practicing with surrogate vision, or working by proxy to looking at it as more of an interface. Something that we’ve talked about a, I haven’t in the book, a lot we’ve talked about is moving into that observer perspective. And so it’s really applying that observer perspective through an interface exchange, as opposed to kind of diving in as a surrogate.
Kelli Russell 14:12
Yeah, we’ll have to have another podcast because that’s going down a totally different path. People might be like, what, what’s what’s by proxy? What’s derogations? Well, maybe that’ll be the next one. I love it. So I had this person I was working with yesterday are really lovely young woman. And she said, in her family, so it was really volatile situation growing up and a lot of people going through some hardcore stuff. And she said, what she learned to do is take on all of the energy of everyone in her family, and she felt this internal responsibility to manage that energy, which was overwhelming so she shields a lot and is really uncomfortable, like she was sharing that she would have to share space in a home kind of like a roommate situation. But she felt really uncomfortable because that’s the one place where she could let her guard down. And if she’s there having to manage the energy of another, then she can’t have her guard down. So she needs to have her guard up all the time. So what I shared with her is, first, it’s not your responsibility to manage all the emotional energy of others. What we like to say a lot from Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr, is your responsibility ends at your fingertips. But we do ripple out like a pond, and affect everyone in everything through the quantum field. But really, we are responsible for how we show up in a place our response to certain situations, our reaction, and the energy that we put off, we are not responsible to take in everybody around us and to monitor or manage transmute or transform their energy that’s up to them. So what we do is we teach people how to shift from almost like being I imagined it like little kids on a playground, the bullys will pick on the ones that have this like V for victim on their forehead, it’s like they can pick them out if they’re coming from a place of being unsure. It’s an
Kevin Russell 16:25
energetic signature. It’s an energetic, almost magnetic attraction based on our experiences.
Kelli Russell 16:32
So when you are strong in your own energy, and you are comfortable, you’re feeling confident. You’re feeling empowered, you’re feeling grounded,
Kevin Russell 16:47
Kelli Russell 16:49
And that is felt. It’s it changes everything. Because no longer do you become somebody else’s doormat or somebody else that like, they’re not only calling you to unload their day upon you, because you’ll fix it.
Kevin Russell 17:06
You’re literally shifting your broadcast message, your energetic broadcast frequency and resonance that are naturally occurring emanations just from living life.
Kelli Russell 17:16
Yeah. And if you’re shielding, that’s cutting yourself off from the flow of energy, we are connected in this quantum grid, to all things everywhere. nonlocality, we are all interconnected. And when we shield up and we put this protection around us, we are cut off from that energy. So what we like to guide people to do and what we do ourselves is to create strength from our inner center and grow our energy field outward. And I think Kevin is really good at guiding us through this process. And he developed or kind of modified a little breath practice to help us disrupt the energy to get there. And we thought it might be cool to do it now.
Kevin Russell 18:05
I’m happy to guide us through that. And I just really wanted to, like emphasize how spot on the example you just shared is with everything we’ve been talking about. So Kelly’s example, all of these behaviors, pattern conditioned behaviors were developed early on in life. And then everything’s fine when we’re by ourselves, because that is interpreted by our mind body system is safety. Because I don’t have to finally, I can put down the you know, the guards don’t have to stand on the parapets anymore, we can stand down a little bit. But as soon as somebody comes into our space, roommate, anything like that, the system is reacting to its blueprint to the playbook it has. And that this happens so often in many different expressions in life where we go through something that maybe felt traumatically at the time, maybe not, but our system is recording it for planning, protection and safety. We grow up we have other experiences, we gain distance from it. And then all of a sudden, we get dropped back into these very visceral, unfortunately familiar expressions. And they seem to come out of the blue. And they can you know, it’s almost like a we call them an emotional drive by where it’s like, where did that come from. And that’s where we get into these, you know, anxious or anxiety or panicky feelings because we aren’t seeing the connection from where they’re from. And we haven’t met necessarily giving or practicing internal insight into inquiry where they’re, where they’re coming from. So this practice of disruption, and then visualization is one that we can use any time that we might be feeling like we’re getting dropped into those expressions if we feel ourselves anxious or heightened, or depressive, or, you know, pulling away and pulling more into our defenses. This is a very quick and powerful mechanism or method that we can use to disrupt whatever we’re expressing. give ourselves a little bit more space to come back into our conscious mind. And from that point, we have options and we have opportunities. So, as Kelli said, well, we’ll jump into that now. So I call this a disruption breath. And it’s simply three short inhalations through our nose. One longer, forceful exhalation through our mouth. Almost like we’re trying to blow a candle out on the opposite side of the room. So constriction in a squeezing of the of the intercostal muscles and the ribs, really bearing down and blowing out. So for this one, we’ll go for about 30 seconds. And it’s a real quick and easy way to kind of shake ourselves out of a reactive state, come back to balance so that we can grow our resonance and broadcast a different message. Instead of having feeling like we have to shield up.
So everybody find a nice comfortable seat. Take a breath or two, just get settled into our space. Feel your body wherever it is, on a couch on a chair sitting on the floor in a meditative position.
Feel the clothes on your skin, feel your chest rising and falling with your breath. And then when we say begin, we’ll begin that disruptive breath process Kelly and I are gonna do it with do it with everyone
and go ahead and begin. Last one, blow it all out take a few recovery breaths. Allow your system to feel the flood of oxygen that we just push through so you could feel some tingling in the crown of your head.
Maybe your ear lobes get a little warm, shoulders, torso gets warm, I’m feeling some slight tingles in my fingertips and my palms. So this is one of the ways to introduce a disruption into our physiology. If anyone’s ever owned a pet, it’s like distracting the pet from whatever they’re focused on. So it’s like a snapper. Hey, if we have ever had a dog, or if we’ve ever had a cat, it’s a disruption of whatever’s currently going on. And from this space, we’ve got a little bit more room to inquire a little bit more room to just exist. It’s good to close your eyes if they’re not already closed. Relax your diaphragm. Settle into the seat wherever you are. We’re going to take nice relaxed belly breaths from the base of the belly to the top of the lungs. Inhaling almost like drawing water up in a syringe from the base of the belly
to the top of the lungs and then exhaling top of the lungs to the base of the belly. And from here, go ahead and ask yourself with whatever label or pronoun is most resonant with you. Source Spirit, God, inner knowing superconscious super whatever your name is. Whatever your label is, go ahead and address your system. I’ll just use superconscious for this example superconscious show me an experience of unconditional love that I’ve had and then just wait for the staying open and curious for what answer is presented to us from our bodies
if nothing arises, we can expand that out superconscious show me an expression of unconditional love that I’ve seen Then again, open and curious, just seeing what comes to us
when you’ve gotten an answer, something you recognize, focus on where you feel this expression of unconditional love or this idea of unconditional love,
and what that feeling feels like. For some, it could be a lightness in the mind.
For others, it can be a warmth, or a subtle glow in our heart space or in our chest. And wherever you’re feeling it, we’re going to direct and guide that feeling right in our heart center right in the middle of our chest. And next, go ahead and envision that right in the middle of your heart space right in the middle of your chest.
There’s a miniature sun with all the dynamic energy of our own star. All the variations of yellows and oranges and reds and whites
that are expressing in this active core of energy. And go ahead and pour that feeling of unconditional love that just been shared with you
into this sun. We’re going to fill it all the way up. So there’s no more room on the inside. Sticking with that diaphragmatic breath. Full draw, inhale from the base of the belly. Nice, relaxed us exhale, letting it all go top of the lungs to the base of the belly again.
Once your heartspace once this miniature Sun feels full, we’re gonna go ahead and grow and expand this internal feeling into our broadcast message. So on your inhale, we’re expanding the diameter of our son. So the first inhale could take it from maybe a tennis ball size up to a softball size. Exhale, we’re grounding into the feeling in energizing our son. intensifying the glow intensifying the energy of the visualization.
Inhale expanding, exhale energizing. continuing to grow that diameter. Maybe from softball size to beach ball size from beach ball size to giant balloon. Expanding and energizing. Inhaling and exhaling. And continue this visualization and breathing pattern until you feel that your internal Sun has eclipsed your physical form. It’s moved beyond the confines of the room or the space you’re in. And it’s expanded 10 to 12 feet in all directions. So you’re completely within the space of unconditional love completely within the space of this expansive, grounded and energized sun that you’ve created to where you can’t even touch the edges of it anymore.
Couple more breaths here. To seal off our practice and firmly establish ourselves in a space of broadcasting unconditional love. Instead of feeling like we have to protect or defend against anything.
When the process feels complete for you, go ahead and let your eyes flutter open. Take on a little bit more light. Maybe roll out your wrists, give yourself a little stretch and come back to the present moment.
Kelli Russell 29:50
So where you’re at now is most likely experiencing consciousness that is solely your own. And that’s something thing you can even choose to say, I release any experiences of consciousness or feeling or sensation that is other than my own. And I now experience consciousness that is fully my own. So I’m releasing what is not mine. And I’m fully present in what is my own energy field. Then when you interface with other people, you can start to become more aware, does that belong to me? No, I’m pretty sure that’s what that person’s feeling over there. And you can have love that you send to them, they’re going through something tough. That unconditional love that we offer that is unlimited, we can pull from anywhere, and it grows exponentially, you’ll never run out. So that’s the easy gift that you can give to all somebody struggling or going through something rough. If we worry about them, or feel down in the dumps, for them, or with them, that only grows that thing that we don’t want, because now you’ve got a rough situation. And then you have somebody worrying about that rough situation or also feeling bad about it. So now there’s two. And then imagine if everybody did that, instead of staying in that high vibration of love. Now, that’s something transformative, that doesn’t harm yourself. So that process that Kevin just led us through is really good to start your day, it’s really good if you’re going to be doing something in public where you’re interacting with a lot of different energies. If you feel there are certain situations that cause you to go into hyper alert, or feels a little rough for you this, you can do this in your car before you head out into that space, or, you know, I like it more at the beginning of the day, rather than the end, what do you think
Kevin Russell 32:00
definitely sets the tone that really helps to set your resonance for the day. And the other thing it provides is contrast. So if we get grounded and centered in this manner, and we’re broadcasting more of a feeling of unconditional love for ourselves, and maybe even unconditional love and acceptance for others, we can differentiate more if we got knocked off of this place, as opposed to what many of us do, and we wake up in some sort of low grades stress, state fight flight freeze. And then we tend towards accumulating more of that for the exact reason that you just shared. And so creating that separation or differentiation between a normal quote unquote, normal, risk averse safety planning and protection mechanism. When we’re feeling this grounding or this expansion, we’re more able to recognize when we get shifted out of it, which gives us more opportunity to shift back into it. And that’s part of the practice is that that that just diligence of awareness, and readiness to shift out of those maybe lesser states of being those more reactive, or more anxious states that we find, tend to find ourselves getting drugged into using this as one of the tools to do so.
Kelli Russell 33:21
And if we can maintain the purity of our own consciousness, imagine being in a social situation. When you’re in your own grounded strength and personal power, then that experience feels different. And when you notice what you’re feeling around you like, oh, okay, that person feels really excited or hyper. That person feels really sad and sorrowful. That person seems really light hearted and funny. That person seems angry. We can observe it happening. Noticing collecting information, we can also notice does this energy feel compatible with mine? Or do I feel repellent towards and we can make decisions based on all those things, but we’re not taking it on as our own to be processed for others. Exactly. Yeah. And then those people that are narcissists that are harmful, that are running their own patterns. We are less available to them, because we are in that grounded sense of calmness, stability, confidence, and we’re not on their radar. So I think overall, it’s a really good
Kevin Russell 34:36
practice to have that we’re no longer available for that dance. Yeah.
Kelli Russell 34:44
All right. I think that’s about it for today. I hope that there was some type of nugget in there that you enjoy it and thanks, Kevin for guiding us through that process. That’s a great one that can be done in just a couple of minutes and you’re set for the day.
Kevin Russell 34:58
Thank you for sharing your insight in your expertise with the work that you do so if this resonates please share please follow and then look forward to joining you next time
Kelli Russell 35:11
until next, time have a great day! bye.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai